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Writer's pictureAaron Hendon

Do a Little Dance, Make a Litte Love, Get Down Tonight


Can you hear the metronome of life?


It's like a heartbeat or our breath—in and out, constantly going back and forth.


Nothing is more natural than one moment we're brimming with potential, hope, and optimism, living from the mindset of "a better world is possible." And then BAM, the next, we find ourselves trapped in the belief "we are so fucked," with despair and resignation taking the wheel.


It happens all the time, every day, from moment to moment.


I used to think this was some defect, some deficiency on my part; if only I was a better person, I wouldn't ever find myself thinking things were fucked.


But what if this back-and-forth isn't a defect, and what if it's not random; what if it's an intrinsic part of who we are?


The Ease of Despair


Interestingly, the journey from "a better world is possible" to "we are so fucked" seems to require little effort.


It's a natural regression, a gravitational pull of sorts.


Without sustained effort, our minds tend to revert to this pessimistic default view.


It could be how we're designed, how we're wired.


Could it be that our brain, as a masterful problem-solving machine, simply looks for potential threats and issues—a survival instinct ingrained deep in our evolutionary history?


We weren't gifted with fangs, claws, or armor. We're not particularly fast, and we can't fly. From a design perspective, what we can do better than any other animal is figure things out, plan for future problems, and execute complex solutions to improve our lives.


Could this default to negativity ensure our survival by keeping us alert and prepared for any danger, perceived or actual?


A joke started in computer programming circles back in 1975: A bug in the code could be turned into a feature by including it in the documentation—the theory being that nobody could complain about it if it's in the manual.


Is this default orientation really a case of "it's not a bug, it's a feature"?


Sustaining Possibility: An Uphill Battle


Just as we all default to "we are so fucked"; we are also all capable of switching to "a better world is possible."


However, sustaining the belief that "a better world is possible" requires ongoing effort and intentionality.


It demands a conscious energy investment and focus to counteract our brain's natural inclination toward negativity. We must actively and intentionally cultivate optimism, reaffirm our goals, and envision life's possibilities.


But that's part of the design as well. Our universal ability to envision a better, more fulfilling future has just as much evidence as "we are so fucked".


If you look for what's possible in any situation, you can find it. But you need to look.


The Myth of a Static State


A significant part of the struggle arises from perceiving the metronome's constant swing as the problem.


If we give up thinking we are somehow deficient or lacking when we get into a funk, when we are in the "fucked" part of the cycle, and if we simply learn to dance to the ongoing beat, we have access to a new world of possibility.


Many of us dream of a state where we are perpetually optimistic and "a better world is possible" is automatic (and permanent).


However, such a static state doesn't exist.


Life is dynamic; it ebbs and flows.


The idea that we should, or even can, remain forever in one state is neither practical nor possible.


Accepting the natural rhythm of our emotional landscape can free us from unnecessary frustration.


Everything Just Is: Life's Impartiality


Start by embracing the metronome, with the recognition that everything "just is."


Life is an impartial force. It doesn't play favorites, and it doesn't have a predetermined agenda.


It presents scenarios, situations, and challenges, leaving it up to us to interpret and navigate them.


This impartiality can serve as a neutral backdrop against which our experiences unfold.


Realizing that life doesn't "care" helps us detach from the emotional intensity that often accompanies our fluctuations between hope and despair.


It may be raining, and you might be getting wet, but it is never raining on you.


Consider the ocean: vast, beautiful, powerful, and unconcerned with individual outcomes. Swim or drown - it matters not at all to the ocean.


The sea remains unchanged whether we marvel at its beauty, harness its power, or struggle against its currents.


Similarly, life itself is an arena that offers countless experiences without favor or prejudice, encouraging us to shape our own narratives within its expanse.


Normalizing the Swing

Once we normalize this swing, the extremities of hope and despair become less jarring.


When we believe that "a better world is possible," we can savor the moment, knowing it might not last but will return.


Similarly, during the "we are so fucked" phases, we can remind ourselves that this, too, is temporary.


The common interpretation of the Buddha's saying, "Life is suffering," is really a misinterpretation of the original Pali. It's more accurate to say suffering is caused by attachment to impermanent life.


To accept the impermanence of life is to accept the metronome.


The Tick-Tock of Life's Metronome


Viewing our emotional metronome as the heartbeat of our existence—a steady, predictable tick-tock—can transform our view of life.


Instead of resisting the motion, we can learn to move gracefully with it, much like dancing to a rhythm.


Recognizing the dance between extremes allows us to engage fully with each phase.


Embracing the high points without clinging to them and enduring the low points with the knowledge of their impermanence, we can learn to flow with life.


This dance is not about avoiding the metronome's swing but moving with it.


Rather than taking each oscillation too seriously, we could find humor in our human condition (GASP).


After all, life's unpredictability is part of its intrigue. We can foster resilience and joy by laughing at the absurdity of our relentless swings.


Freedom in Acceptance


Embracing the metronome's swing between "a better world is possible" and "we are so fucked" offers profound freedom.


It frees us from the futile quest for a static state and allows us to engage fully with the present moment.


This acceptance is not resignation but a dynamic engagement with life's natural rhythm.


In embracing the oscillation, we might discover that life's beauty lies not in a fixed destination but in the ongoing journey. By dancing with the beat, we cultivate a resilient spirit, a compassionate heart, and an unwavering inner strength.


With every funky beat of the metronome, we have a new chance to, in the words of a sage, do a little dance, make a little love, and get down tonight.

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